A Cowboy's Guide to Life

I've seen many of these before, but they're worth repeating.

Don't interfere with something that ain't botherin' you none.

The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm. The colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller.

If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

If it don't seem like it's worth the effort, it probably ain't.

The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with watches you shave his face in the mirror every morning.

Never ask a barber if you need a haircut.

Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong.

Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

You cannot unsay a cruel word.

Every path has a few puddles.

When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

The best sermons are lived, not preached.

Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen, anyway.

Don't judge folks by their relatives.

Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

Don't worry about bitin' off more'n you can chew; your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.

Generally, you ain't learnin' nothing when your mouth's a-jawin'.

If you ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there with ya.

Good judgement comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgement.

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back.

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back into your pocket.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Don't squat with your spurs on.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.

There's three kinds of men: the one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation and the rest of them have to tinkle on the electric fence for themselves.

Never kick a cowchip on a hot day.

Never slap a man who's chewin' tobacco.

When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.

When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. - A hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Do the next indicated right thing. Leave the rest to God.

Making Small Talk

And Speaking of Small Talk... The art and beauty of making light conversation
TEXT BY SALLY ABRAHMS DECEMBER 8, 2000

Your holiday party schedule is sobering! You've got two company shindigs--yours and your spouse's--and five more invitations from friends.

If you're a smooth talker, you'll find it equally effortless to chat up the CEO standing beside you as the stranger waiting in line at the bar. For the 80 percent of us who find small talk awkward, however, breaking the ice, keeping the conversation going, and tactfully unloading a bore can be tough stuff. But it's important.

Talking up small talk

Small talk reaps big benefits. "So much of getting ahead is about building relationships with people who matter, and small talk can accomplish that better than anything," maintains Jill Bremer, president of Bremer Communications, a Chicago company that offers communication skills workshops. "Ambition and expertise will only get you so far. Charm may be the one quality that gets you ahead."

Whether it's an elevator ride with your boss or a sit down dinner party, social encounters offer great personal and professional opportunities. They can lead to networking, promotions, new jobs and friends. That's because people feel comfortable doing business with people they like and trust. Building a rapport begins with small talk.

According to Roget's II New Thesaurus, small talk is defined as "incessant and usually inconsequential talk: babble, blab, blabber, chat, chatter, chitchat, jabber, palaver, prate, prattle. Slang: gab, gas, yak."

In a word, Mr. Roget is wrong. Just ask the experts. Recent research conducted at Stanford and Harvard Universities found the top skill for the twentieth century is the ability to talk to others.

So, can we talk?

All well and good, you might say. But how does one do it? Smile, be friendly, make direct eye contact, look interested, and you'll be approachable and inviting. Also be an equal opportunity talker. "The smart person treats the spouse with the same warmth and interest as the boss," maintains Susan RoAne, a San Francisco communications coach and author of How to Work a Room, The Secrets of Savvy Networking, and What Do I Say Next?

A little flattery, unless it's flagrantly phony, can also ingratiate you instantly. It could be something as simple as "I love your sweater! Did you knit it?" or "great tie!"

What's the best way to engage someone? Take holiday parties again. Try, "What are your plans for the holidays? Have you seen any good movies lately? I'm looking for a book to read. Any suggestions? Have you seen the new Van Gogh exhibit? Have you tried any good restaurants lately? What did you do before you came here today? How do you know the hostess? or How are you finding motherhood?"

RoAne instructs clients to "build on what people are interested in. One conversation leads to another and that third chat may be the one that gets you the lead, the sale, the interview."
Barbara Lee of Brookline, Massachusetts, who hosts and attends many cocktail parties, finds small talk a snap. "I try to find a connection and keep at it until I do," she says. "I don't start off talking about myself. I ask questions because people love to talk about themselves."

"I think of myself as a reporter who is trying to get to know the person and discover where our lives might intersect," Lee explains. "The minute I find that intersection it becomes the connection upon which I build. Then when I see the person again, I can say, 'I remember you were telling me about your son's college hunt. What happened? Or I loved hearing about your vacation to the dude ranch. Are you going back?' Then when I see them again there's an instant rapport."

"The real art in small talk is how you keep the conversation flowing," believes Bremer. "Good conversationalists don't monopolize the conversation, they orchestrate it. That means they talk less and listen more. If they're in a small group, they make sure everyone is included, drawing in those who may have just walked up. They ask a question and listen actively to the response. They elaborate on what was just said with comments from their own experience and then--here comes the really important part--they ask another question! The Q & A format is what keeps the flow going."

Margo Krasne, the New York City author of Say It With Confidence and founder of "Speak Up!" workshops, warns clients to never speak for more than one minute.

Straight talk

If you're cursed with cement mouth, you don't have to be stuck. Small talk is a skill that can be cultivated. Being informed on local and world events and industry news gives you infinite subjects to discuss. One way to keep current is to read the newspaper and a newsmagazine the day of the event. Some smooth talkers head to the newsstand or online to peruse periodicals so they can interject fascinating or offbeat factoids into a conversation.

It's hard to believe, but if all else fails, the weather will work for starting a conversation, especially if it's been unbearably hot or particularly rainy or raw.

You don't say!

Off-limit chitchat includes sex, gossip ("Penny put on so much weight, is she pregnant?"), money problems, marital spats, and depressing issues. Swearing and complaining are also no-no's. Who wants to converse with a whiner?

Bag the heavy topics, unless it's politics, and then know your audience. If your crowd is conservative, save discussion about the recent release of the abortion pill for your intimate book club. If you're with a group of hunters and bring up the virtues of gun control, you're likely to trigger bad feeling rather than pleasant talk.

If you bring up work, keep it light. Making a business plug at a social event is a faux pas. If, for instance, a guest is telling you about his interest in e-books and the Napster case, offering your opinion on copyright and ownership are appropriate. But if you launch into a discussion about how he should upgrade to software you sell, it's not a conversation, it's a tacky pitch.

You snooze, you lose

Okay, you've tried. The weather isn't changing the dull conversational climate nor is the other person's reflections on rare birds in Sri Lanka. "If a person is boring, you just haven't found the topic that gets them jazzed," says RoAne. That may be, but when you're ready to move on, it's important to be gracious. "That boring person you rudely leave could be next year's billionaire who could have hired you!" she believes.

End game

It's time to circulate. Excuse yourself and tell the person you hope to see him again (okay, so it's a white lie!). Or offer your hand, which signals your departure and say, "I hope you enjoy the rest of the conference (party, meeting)" and move to another group or area.

Krasne advises people who want to penetrate a group to stand close by while they're talking, wait for the right moment, and then ask a question.

What do you think of that idea?


SALLY ABRAHMS co-author of What Every Woman Should Know About Divorce and Custody, finds the title of her latest book elicits easy small talk, since she's never been divorced.

NOTE: Jugglezine owns the copyright to Sally's piece. Jugglezine is an ezine about balancing work and life sponsored by Herman Miller, Inc.

Women Inventors in the 1880's

Patent no. 22094. Filing year 1885.
"Druggist's Sieve," Eliza E. Scott.

Women inventors in 19th century Canada were few and far between, and those who did register patents focused their efforts mainly on the domestic sphere. Eliza E. Scott's "Druggist's Sieve" represented a significant foray into the male-dominated field of Canada's then-emerging pharmaceutical industry.

Scott's patent consisted of a wooden box containing a cylindrical sieve that was rotated with a handle mounted on the outside of the box. Compounds to be sifted were poured into the cylinder, which was then latched shut, as was the box. Once the substance had been sifted by rotating the cylinder, the bottom of the box holding the sifted material could be slid out and the box and cylinder washed.

Scott was also notable for being more articulate than most patent-holders, who in their applications typically stuck to describing the basic mechanics of their inventions. Scott, on the other hand, provided a historical context for her creation. She wrote, "This invention relates to a very handy, convenient and healthy device for sifting druggists' powder compounds, many of which are deadly poisons, and destructive to those handling them, especially in the operation of cleaning and sifting them. Heretofore the only device used for the purpose has been simply a common open sieve, the dust from which in sifting poisonous compounds arises and penetrates the ears, nostrils and mouth of the operator, as well as pervading the whole room in which the operation is carried on, rendering the air unfit for human beings to breathe."

On the face of it, a sensible invention. However, the lack of information on Scott or her sieve casts doubts on whether the pharmaceutical community saw much merit in it. From what we know about Scott, who invented the sieve when she was around 38, she was almost certainly not a registered druggist, and did not list an occupation in the census records of the day. For several years before and after her invention, however, Scott lived with an older woman named Ellen Lewis, who manufactured various patent medicines, including "Mrs. Lewis' Celebrated Cough Syrup" and "Blood Purifying Bilious Bitters."

If Scott participated in the ventures of Mrs. Lewis (to whom she may have been related) she would have been involved in an alternative medicine movement that enjoyed considerable popularity at the time -- despite the fact that the claims of the hawkers invariably overshot the health benefits of their products.

To be fair, there wasn't much in the way of legitimate choice for the public. Many medicines we now take for granted had not yet been invented; Aspirin, for example, only came on the scene in 1898. Patent medicines were both more readily available and cheaper than conventional medicine, and that many druggists and chemists in Canada at the time were untrained and unqualified, despite mid-century efforts to regulate the industry. Doctors were also relatively scarce: at the time of Confederation, the number of unlicensed medical practitioners in Ontario was at least double that of licensed ones.

It wasn't until the 20th century was well underway that advances in chemistry led to the creation of more reliable medicines, and the medical industry became better organized and controlled. Until then, the likes of "snake-oil salesmen" had a strong hold on the popular imagination.

References
Thanks to Anne McKeage, history of health and medicine librarian at the Health Sciences Library, McMaster University, and Hamilton historian Janet Bryers for their assistance on this profile.
Bernier, Jacques. Disease, Medicine and Society in Canada: A Historical Overview. Ottawa: Canadian Historical Association, 2003.
Canadian Pharmaceutical Association. A Brief History of Pharmacy in Canada. Toronto: Canadian Pharmaceutical Association, 1969.
Godfrey, Charles M. Medicine for Ontario: A History. Belleville, Ont.: Mika Publishing Company, 1979.
Hutchinson's Hamilton Directory of 1862-63. Hamilton [Ont.]: J. Eastwood, 1862.
Hamilton Census Returns for 1871 and 1881.
Norrie, Kenneth, and Douglas Owram. A History of the Canadian Economy. Toronto: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich Canada, 1991.

Home remedy for sore throats

You can try the following remedy whenever you feel like you're about to get a cold.

1 clove of garlic, crushed
Equal amount of onion, crushed
1/8 - 1/4 tsp Cayenne powder
1/2 tsp Ginger powder
1 tsp Apple cider vinegar

To get the garlic and onion crushed you can use a garlic press or a microplane rasp to get them into a really fine juicy pulp.

Mix it all up and eat it.

Not fun, but better than a cold. Try not to eat on an empty stomach, cause it can cause stomach pains. Some say they usually try to do this once in the morning and once before they go to bed for a day or two.

Another thing that helps with a sore throat - resist ALL urges to "click" or rub the back of the roof of your mouth with your tongue, and spit out your saliva instead of swallowing it (as much as possible). The soreness goes away very quickly. Zinc lozenges can be your friend here too.

If you ever find a glass ball and don't know what it is . . .

1 TARGET or RANGE BALL 2 1/2" in diameter, overall diamond pattern glass in a very light yellow / green color, rough sheared mouth on a unusually long neck. Super mint condition! I have never seen another ball in a color like this. Very rare!

These were used in wild west shows and shooting events in the mid to late 1800's. Used before clay pigeons, a similar type holder was used to throw the ball. They were filled with feathers or paper so the shooter and audience knew when the ball was hit.

This ball is empty. As one can only imagine, not very many of these are left to collect . $300.00

Prayer

This is a statement that (SUPPOSEDLY, A.D. note) was read over the PA system at the football game at Roane County High School , Kingston , Tennessee , by school Principal, Jody McLeod.


"It has always been the custom at Roane County High School football games, to say a prayer and play the National Anthem, to honor God and Country."


Due to a recent ruling by the Supreme Court, I am told that saying a Prayer is a violation of Federal Case Law. As I understand the law at this time, I can use this public facility to approve of sexual perversion and call it "an alternate lifestyle," and if someone is offended, that's OK.


I can use it to condone sexual promiscuity, by dispensing condoms and calling it, "safe sex." If someone is offended, that's OK.


I can even use this public facility to present the merits of killing an unborn baby as a "viable” means of birth control." If someone is offended, no problem...


I can designate a school day as "Earth Day" and involve students in activities to worship religiously and praise the goddess "Mother Earth" and call it "ecology."


I can use literature, videos and presentations in the classroom that depicts people with strong, traditional Christian convictions as "simple minded" and "ignorant" and call it "enlightenment."


However, if anyone uses this facility to honor GOD and to ask HIM to Bless this event with safety and good sportsmanship, then Federal Case Law is violated.


This appears to be inconsistent at best, and at worst, diabolical. Apparently, we are to be tolerant of everything and anyone, except GOD and HIS Commandments.


Nevertheless, as a school principal, I frequently ask staff an d students to abide by rules with which they do not necessarily agree. For me to do otherwise would be inconsistent at best, and at worst, hypocritical... I suffer from that affliction enough unintentionally. I certainly do not need to add an intentional transgression.


For this reason, I shall "Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar's," and refrain from praying at this time.


"However, if you feel inspired to honor, praise and thank GOD and ask HIM, in the name of JESUS, to Bless this event, please feel free to do so. As far as I know, that's not against the law----yet."


One by one, the people in the stands bowed their heads, held hands with one another and began to pray.


They prayed in the stands. They prayed in the team huddles. They prayed at the concession stand and they prayed in the Announcer's Box!


The only place they didn't pray was in the Supreme Court of the United States of America- the Seat of "Justice" in the "one nation, under GOD."


Somehow, Kingston, Tennessee remembered what so many have forgotten. We are given the Freedom OF Religion, not the Freedom FROM Religion. Praise GOD that HIS remnant remains!


JESUS said, "If you are ashamed of ME before men, then I will be ashamed of you before MY FATHER."

Questions I haven't got around to answering yet

1. If you could build a house anywhere, where would it be?
2. What's your favorite article of clothing?
3. Favorite physical feature of the opposite sex?
4.What's the last CD that you bought?
5.Where's your favorite place to be?
6. Where is your least favorite place to be?
7.What's your favorite place to be massaged?
8.Strong in mind or strong in body?
9.What time do you wake up in the morning?
10. What is your favorite kitchen appliance?
11.What makes you really angry?
12. If you could play any instrument, what would it be?
13. Favorite color?
14.Which do you prefer...sports car or SUV?
15. Do you believe in an afterlife?
16.Favorite children's book?
17. What is your favorite season?
18. Your least favorite household chore?
19.If you could have one super power, what would it be?
20.If you have a tattoo, what is it?
21.Can you juggle?
22. The one person from your past that you wish you could go back and talk to?
23. What's your favorite day?
24. What's in the trunk of your car?
25. Which do you prefer, sushi or hamburger?

History of the Sheriff

The following history of the office of sheriff is provided by the National Sheriff's Association publications.

The office of sheriff is the oldest political office in the western world. It has existed in one form or another since the reign of King Alfred the Great (871-901 A.D.). The office of sheriff evolved from a rudimentary method for providing local control and services under the monarchy to an arm of democratic government fully invested in the constitutional pursuit of justice. Significantly, it has remained a fundamentally local institution.

The roots of the office of sheriff may be found in Anglo-Saxon England. Families came together in groups of ten families. They were called tithing. The leader of these groups were called tithing men, who were elected by each tithing. He had the responsibility of raising the Hue and Cry (a process in which every able-bodied man had to participate in the chase and apprehension of offenders; this was the origin of today's citizen's arrest).

Tithing was further organized into groups of ten called hundreds. The headman of a hundred was called a Reeve. Several hundreds combined to form a Shire, an area equivalent to a county. The leader of the shire was called a shire-reeve, from which it is believed the word sheriff evolved.

The office of sheriff migrated to the English colonies in America early in our history. In 1634, sheriffs began to assume the duties of the provost marshal in a few colonies, and the King of England appointed them, just as the King appointed all sheriffs in England. Virginia was the first with an appointed sheriff, followed by Maryland in 1638.

The colony of Virginia held its first election of sheriff in 1651. There were sheriffs in all thirteen colonies in the years leading up to the Revolutionary War. It was Sheriff Nixon who read the Declaration of Independence on the steps of Independence Hall in 1775.

During the great westward expansion of the United States, the sheriff was installed in every territory and state. The sheriff followed near on the heels of the pioneers who settled the areas. Violence was a common problem on the frontier, and the idea that there had to be a "taming" of the west was what had the sheriffs moving west just behind the first pioneers.

These new migrating sheriffs retained their common law duties. One common law power that became particularly important in the sparsely populated and expansive western lands was that of Posse Comitatus, "the power of the county." This put all of the able-bodied men in the county at the disposal of the sheriff, a clear benefit at a time when the sheriff had few deputies at his disposal.

For over 176 years the office of sheriff has been present here in our county. It is the oldest and longest-standing law enforcement agency in the county of Delaware. On February 13, 1827, Peter Nolan became the first sheriff of Delaware County, Indiana.

Early sheriffs patrolled on horseback, brought criminals to justice, and held criminals at the sheriff's house. Before a county building was present, the sheriff would hold prisoners awaiting court where the current county building sits now. The prisoners were told that they had to stay between a couple of trees and rocks and could not cross an imaginary line. The more dangerous criminal was chained to a tree. Court was held in an old livery stable which sat on the corner.

While being held at the sheriff's house, the prisoners would be kept in shackles and bolted to the floor. The sheriff's wife fed and took care of the prisoners until it was time for them to leave. Where the current Justice Center now stands, there was an old log cabin-style jail that held prisoners. Through the years, several jails were built at this same site. The sheriff and his wife used to live at the jail up until the 1950s, when a new jail was built.

In the mid-1990s, the transformation of the sheriff and his duties was greatly expanded. What began as a horseback sheriff housing prisoners in his home evolved into a full-service sheriff's office, which provides law enforcement, patrol duties, security to the courts, service of civil process, and operation of the county jail.

The office of sheriff is potentially the most powerful in the entire criminal justice system. And its influence extends far beyond that system. There are at least five reasons for this:

First, the sheriff is the chief law enforcement officer in his county. This status derives from the Common Law and applies whether the office in question is established by constitution or statute. It is also typical for sheriffs to be constitutionally or legislatively authorized to assume the functions of municipal law enforcement within their counties under circumstances of a breakdown of public order, wide-scale corruption, or collapse of the local enforcement mechanism.

Second, the sheriff is elected at-large on a county-wide basis. This, of course, means that the sheriff is directly accountable to the entire electorate for his performance. The sheriff typically garners a significant portion of the votes cast; this is a great source of power and an awesome responsibility.

Third, the county sheriff is the only agency head with specific constitutional or statutory responsibilities for performing functions in all three of the subsystems of the criminal justice system: law enforcement, courts, and corrections. This tripartite authority provides the sheriff with legitimate -- in fact, mandatory -- roles to play in the full range of policy-making across the subsystem.

Fourth, the sheriff performs at least five significant leadership roles that influence the health and well-being of his community. He is a political leader. He is a criminal justice leader. He is a community leader. He is a leader of his organization and a technical leader. This makes him a resource to other key policy makers as well as to the general public in his community.

Fifth, the sheriff is part of an institution that transcends the local community. He has peers in 46 states in the Union. He is part of a state coalition of his peers that wields significant influence in the development of policy and law. He and his state colleagues are part of a national coalition that performs the same role in Washington, D.C. As elected officials themselves, the sheriffs represent a powerful -- and short -- link between state and federal lawmakers and their constituents "back home." When sheriffs speak, legislators listen.

Unintended uses for new technology

No, I don't want to go out with you

One of the fun things about new technology is guessing how it will be used. There is always the way you, the designer, intended it to be used of course, but what about the ways you never thought of. Sometimes that can be a big problem, when the technology is safety-critical and people start using short cuts to make their lives easier, but in a way that compromises the safety system. Other times it just means people jump on an obvious opportunity to make their lives easier. Mobile phones have done that for women.

It is also a great technology for saying "Push-off" to over-enthusiastic men who are heading your way

Some blokes assume that a woman on her own in a bar must be "available", and given they think a lot of themselves, it follows she must fancy them. Getting such over-amorous men to get the message that you don't actually think they re God's gift to women and you actually dont want a drink with them used to be a bit of a pain.

Then came the mobile - a tool for communicating with people you weren't with you might have thought? Turns out, as most women know, it is also a great technology for saying "Push-off" to over-enthusiastic men who are heading your way. Picking up your mobile and start talking or texting is a sure way to get the message across! A recent study into the way we use mobiles found that 54% of women under 25 had used their phone that way.

Rhymes with "pain."

Dear Word Detective:

What is a "swain" (as in "young swain")? -- Roy Cameron.

Good question. "Swain" is a great word that almost no one uses anymore, except occasionally in a sarcastic sense.

A "swain" is a male admirer or suitor. "Swain" is basically a classy way of saying "boyfriend," although "swain" does imply a level of interest and devotion that many boyfriends seem to lack.

A "swain" brings flowers to your door. A "swain" does not sit in his car honking the horn.

The original meaning of "swain," however, had nothing to do with courtship. "Swain" arrived in English in the 12th century from the Old Norse "sveinn," and at first meant simply "boy" or "servant," particularly a young man serving a knight. A knight's "swain" polished the boss's armor, cared for his horse, and acted as his valet.

By the 16th century, however, knights were getting scarce, and "swain" took on the meaning of "farm laborer" or "shepherd." For the "swain" himself, such an occupation consisted largely of unglamorous, often backbreaking work. But at that time country life was widely romanticized, considered a simpler, purer existence, and poets like Robert Greene began to use "swain" in the sense of "gallant lover" in their pastoral fantasies.

Five centuries later, we still use "swain" in this sense, but now almost always in a jocular or sarcastic tone implying that the "swain" might not be such a great catch after all, as in "Deborah's swain turned out to be a mousy accountant with a wife in Hoboken."
Incidentally, "swain" isn't the only word in the world of love and romance that started out denoting a lowly aide to a knight.

When "bachelor," today meaning "an unmarried man," entered English from the Old French "bacheler" in the 13th century, it meant "apprentice knight." The next notable sense of "bachelor" to develop was "one who has achieved the first degree at a university," as opposed to the more advanced "master of arts" (both of which terms are still in use). But since most university "bachelors" were young men, not yet married, by the late 14th century "bachelor" had taken on its modern meaning of "unmarried man."

Jokes that made me laugh

Q: What form of birth control do most lawyers use?
A: Their personalities.

Q: How can you tell when your divorce is getting ugly ?
A: When your lawyer doesn't seem like a bloodsucking leech anymore.

Q: What's the difference between a dog and a fox?
A: About four drinks.

Q: What's the difference between "anxiety" and "panic"?
A: "Anxiety" occurs the first time you can't do it the second time. "Panic" occurs the second time you can't do it the first time.


The professor had the following as an extra credit question on an exam:
An age-old question is "How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?" Answer that question given the following:
Each angel requires an area equal to a circle with a diameter the size of a gold atom in which to dance.
The pin in question has a head which is a circular plane with a diameter of 0.5 mm.
Make any other assumptions necessary to solve the problem.
The professor was sorry to admit that he had to give full credit to the following answer:
I assume that angels do not exist. The answer is 0.

A man is at work one day when he notices that one of his co-workers is wearing an earring. This co-worker is normally a pretty conservative fellow, so the man is curious about this sudden change in fashion.
He walks up to the co-worker and says, "I didn't know you wore an earring."
"Don't make such a big deal... It's only an earring," the guy replies sheepishly.
The man falls silent for a few minutes but then his curiosity prods him to say, "So, how long have you been wearing one?"
"Ever since my wife found it in my truck."


Lottery winner
A woman came home, screeched into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!"
"Oh my God!" her husband yelled back. "Wait... What should I pack?"
"Doesn't matter," she yelled back. "Just get the hell out."


After a meeting at a bar, the couple returned to the woman's apartment for a nightcap. Before long, things turned passionate and the pair headed for the bedroom, clothes flying as they went.
Ten minutes later, the women suddenly sat straight up in bed. "Oh, my God!" she cried. "My husband's coming in the door!"
"Shit," the fellow exclaimed, desperately trying to find his trousers. "Where's the back door ?"
"There is no back door," the woman replied.
"Well," he asked, "where would you like one ?"


"You know that "look" women get when they want sex? Me neither." - Steve Martin


Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet." - Robin Williams


The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.


A good memory
Three old men were sitting around reminiscing about their earliest memories. The first said, "Yeah, I remember my first birthday party; had about a dozen tykes there."
The second says, "Your first birthday! That's nothin'... I remember waking up in the hospital the day after I was born."
The third one wasn't saying much, so the other two - thinking he couldn't remember anything - tried to poke him up a little. "What's the first thing you remember, George ?" one of them asked.
"Oh," George said, "I guess that'd be going to the prom with my father and coming home with Mom."


A rancher bought a champion bull for his herd of cows. When he got it back to the ranch, though, the bull was listless and didn't perform as expected. The rancher called the vet, who came to examine the prize bull. After the examination, the vet gave the rancher a bottle of tonic and told him to give the bull one spoonful per day.
The next day the rancher gave the bull a spoonful. A few minutes later the bull roused himself and took an energetic interest in the rancher's cows. The day after that, the rancher gave the bull another spoonful; again, the bull made himself useful with the cows.
The third day the rancher had a friend visiting, and the friend watched as the bull received his spoonful of tonic and enthusiastically began to perform his duty.
"Wow!" said the friend. "What's in that stuff?"
"I don't know," replied the rancher, "but it tastes sort of like wintergreen."


Fighter pilots
Q: How do you know if there is a fighter pilot at your party?
A: He'll tell you.

Q: What's the difference between God and a fighter pilot?
A: God never thinks He's a fighter pilot.

Q: What's the difference between a fighter pilot and a jet engine?
A: The jet engine stops whining when the plane shuts down.


Three men are sitting stiffly side by side on a long commercial flight. After they're airborne and the plane has leveled off, the man in the window seat abruptly says, distinctly and in a loud voice, "Willowby, Admiral, United States Navy, retired. Married, two sons, both surgeons."
After a few minutes the man in the aisle seat states through a tight-lipped smile, "Sloan. Admiral, United States Coast Guard, retired. Married, two sons, both judges."
After some thought, the fellow in the center seat decides to introduce himself. With a twinkle in his eye he proclaims, " O'Bryan, Master Chief Gunnery Sergeant, United States Marines, retired. Never married, two sons, both Admirals."

I haven't been able to do this correctly yet

Downloading clips from Google Video

Lifehacker.org describes how to escape out of URL encoding withn query string parameters to download clips from Google Video instead of streaming them in the embedded Flash player:

· Go to Google Video and find a video.

· View the page source code and search for the keyword ‘googleplayer‘

· Copy and paste the videoUrl parameter (all of the characters after the keyword ‘videoUrl=’)

· Press Ctrl-L to go to URL location bar. Type Javascript:unescape(”videoUrl”) where videoUrl should be the last parameter you have copied into the clipboard.

· It should output the actual URL on the broswer, copy and paste that URL onto your browser location bar again to download the FLV movie.

· Play it with a FLV Player.

This works in both Firefox and IE, and is hacky enough to be useful from time to time. And Google's safe - being in the source code, the key info's pretty safeguarded from programmatic access, which would turn Google's streaming service into one big download center. And the complexity of searching through source code and mangling the URL is probably complex enough to keep this away from the masses.

posted by Jason Salas @ 7:29 AM 0 comments links to this post